S.H.E.

Stunning Heroine Evolving

Stunning - one who causes or is capable of causing astonishment, bewilderment or a loss of consciousness or strength. When we are completely living in the LIGHT of Christ, we are able to dispel all forms of DARKNESS  or "stun" the enemy in his tracks from all his tactics and schemes that derail us from our God given path. This page is dedicated to highlighting the type of woman who is a heroine evolving into her purpose,  leaving a mark on the world around her, and sharing her light with those she encounters.

Jennifer Jenkins on Hope...

How do I define hope? Hope is my belief and my confident expectation that no matter how things may seem in the moment, something greater is going to come. The beautiful thing about this is that I have this expectation even when things are already seemingly great. It's like I see the light at the end of the tunnel when I'm in a dark place that wants to overtake me and it is the light that gives me the energy to keep going; then, when I step into the light I am encouraged even further because even though there is seemingly no more darkness, there is so much light to be explored. What once was a glimmer, the light, is now an overflow. Hope, for me, is the expectation that there will always be an overflow of greatness. 

The times I have found it most challenging to maintain hope have always come through my relationships with other people. Expecting people to uphold their end of "the deal" and being disappointed by their lack of foresight, follow through, consideration, etc., has always been difficult for me because I see the greatness in everyone. What is often difficult to accept is that most people do not see the greatness within themselves and so they settle for good rather than working for more. I maintain my ability to hope despite their actions, shortcomings, and disappointments by continuing to trust in God. Many times a situation becomes hopeless because we have yet to realize that our place is not as the solution to the problem or even the solver of the puzzle. We were put here to love on, encourage, and hold each other accountable but we were not placed here to be a god to anyone and all too often we try to play God which comes with very damaging consequences. Prayer, meditation, and fasting have become my trifecta of choice as I work not only to surrender my struggles to God but also to surrender the other individual into His hands as well.

My suggestions for those who find themselves feeling hopeless and/or defeated is to first find the trigger that makes them feel this way and once they have done that they then need to assess why that trigger was given so much power over them. Once this has been done, pray and ask for guidance in how to move forward as well as the strength to surrender future moves to God. I would also strongly suggest that the individual find a professional counselor, minister, life coach, or mentor that they can share openly with to assist them in moving forward while also reconciling the past. Also, a person should discover the reason they were created. When we lack a purpose, we lack drive, passion, and many times hope. Purpose creates vision and a sense of direction. Finally, if the hopelessness/defeat results from the loss of a promise, heartbreak, or loss of any sort I have written a book entitled Surviving Spiritual Heartbreak: Surrendering the Pain to Secure Your Promise that can assist in the healing process. I also serve as a minister, life coach, and counselor. For those who may be interested in knowing more about my book or desire to speak further, more information can be found on my website at www.JenniferAJenkins.com. 

Masica Williams on Discipline...

Discipline is letting your yes be yes and your no be no. When I told myself I would go to the gym three times a week, I followed through because I said I'm going to go. Discipline says let yes be yes and no be your no. Deciding to get married, I took on the role to be a wife by saying "til death do us part." This same thinking applies to other areas of your life. My yes, in this season, is always founded on something that I heard from God. A lot of stuff is good; it just may not be good for me.  So whatever I'm doing now, God gave me the green light to do it. If he says don't do something, I have to have discipline to not do it.

What defining moment led to your resolve to live a disciplined lifestyle and what steps did you take to implement it?

I'm wired this way. As early as 2nd grade, I remember just sensing when I should walk away from certain movies or seemingly small things that I just wasn't supposed to see, do or hear. It wasn't about what I wanted to do; it was what would God want me to do. 

I guess a defining moment would be when I decided on my own will to get involved in a relationship that was extremely terrible. I thought I could create a Christian out of this man, but I ended up getting accepted into this world instead. I eventually learned that I had to choose life, which ultimately means choosing Christ. And,  even in little things: If God didn't say do it, I desire not to do it.

What would you say to people who feel discipline is rigid and confining?

That discipline is in fact the opposite. The Bible says, "Christ came to set captives free." In him I live, move and have my being. If you're in him, you are free indeed. If I'm in Him,  I should be looking like that. It's not locked up nor caged up. I'm more free because of Christ in me. Those who aren't, their brains tend to  seem chaotic and that is overwhelming. I don't feel overwhelmed. 

What area of your life suffered the most prior to your change and what area thrives the most due to activating discipline?

Making decisions big and small.  I suffered by making rash decisions or rushing errors. At times, I felt like I had ADD or like I was scattered all over the place. People on the outside thought I was holding it all together but my brain literally felt scattered. I said to myself if they perceive me to be at a 10, when I'm really operating on a 5, what would or could my 10 really look like? Now, all I feel is peace.

For more information or resources from Dr. Masica Williams, please visit her website, www.drmjministries.org

Shalanna Blades on Persistence...

Persistence means staying in the fire knowing you won't be consumed because it's a part of the process. You can't have anything worth something without persistence. Everything in life doesn't come easily so you have to stick with it. It's a character builder.

What do you believe has helped shape your drive or motivation for greatness?

I read an insert from Catherine Gambill's book, Miracle in the Middle, and she talked about being anchored in God and His word. Her book points out the importance of staying ready (one could say the same as putting on the full armor of God daily). This proactive approach requires you to know and embrace what you believe before the storm hits as a crucial battle strategy. Catherine states that we should ask ourselves the following questions: "What are your absolutes? What are the unchangeable truths you hold to in the midst of change? What are the commitments in the middle that will not be compromised?" It is vital to revise them frequently and confess them consistently because our purpose is a living organism. 

I was not always successful (still working on it as I am at a different level of my Christian journey) at dealing with setbacks. I would throw a pity party and get others to join in with me. Today, I literally STOP... Stop my mind from embarking on a wondrous path to "woe-is-me" land.. Stop speaking lethal words that could kill/derail my promise...Stop battling it on my own.  God has presented many setbacks in my life - not to harm me or keep me from anything worthwhile - but to protect me from me and strengthen me; as well as, prepare me to cherish the great blessings that He has for me. Setbacks have become my training ground for His glory and my purpose story. 

How do you deal with setbacks and challenges?
Setbacks and challenges are like the Achilles heel. But now I deal with them with the approach of learning what they can show me as they are form of God's protection for something greater. Sometimes, we can move full fledge ahead which is fine at times because you're planning and moving in action to the goal. But at time, God says, " Hold up because I'm preventing you from something." Now I see them as God telling me to hold up because He wants to show me something. 

What would you tell someone who is on the brink of giving up on their dream or in pursuing a major goal?

DON'T YOU DARE MOVE! Where the greatest frustration is present is also when you're on the cusp of a breakthrough - especially if God said it. His reputation is on the line so don't you dare move.

Who do you believe would be most impacted if you gave up on your present dream? Why?

Everybody that's connected to me. Yes, someone indirectly or directly because it's just how God moves and operates. Sometimes  when you're driving in a car behind a slow driver and you rush and grow impatient because the car isn't moving fast enough, we don't think how God may be preventing us from an accident that lies ahead. I just feel like God is a master orchestrator so whatever He says He needs me to do, I must realize it's not just about me. I feel like anything that God calls me to do affects everyone connected to me - from my family to friends to people I don't even know. Kingdom business doesn't necessarily have a name. It's not just for so and so. I think it may be more of like a domino effect if I don't do it. If I give up, what God needs to accomplish through me won't go forth or God will use someone else. And lastly, myself would ultimately be impacted because I'm missing out on God's greatness for me.

Shannon Scates on Love...

Who's love has most impacted your life and why?

Outside of an obvious answer, God :), I would say my mom's. I've learned so much about true, unconditional love just observing how she deals with the people placed in her life. Through her I've seen forgiveness at its finest, mercy at its best, and sacrifice at its greatest. The most touching moments are when I have witnessed her extend such things to those who really just don't deserve it all. At times, it would make me upset, but I would always get that tap on my shoulder from above like "...now what if I treated YOU that way...because what really do you "deserve"?" So, it has just been awesome to be able to see an example of God's love being expressed in human form. It has given me a realistic scope on love and how great, yet difficult (at times), it can be.

Who is someone that needs your love the most and why? 

Hmmmmm... I don't know if I can narrow that down to one person. One of my lifelong goals is to be better at love...to be better at giving it even when it is most difficult. I very often don't pass that test lol, but it's a journey I'll be on for the rest of my life. I want to give love in all of my interactions, because who needs it most can and will change...and who needs it most wont always be an obvious answer. You never know what kind of day a person is having. You never whether the smile you gave...the word of encouragement...the random expression of love could have saved somebody's life. I desire to just be His light in general and do my best at walking in love in all my interactions.

Which is more powerful: love or hate? 

Well, God is love...and what/who is more powerful than that? Love over everything. In the world we live in, it only appears that hate is winning because it's easier to do. It's easier to be dismissive versus taking out the time to understand someone or something. It's easier to be ignorant versus doing the hard work to gain true knowledge and wisdom.

What do you love most about yourself?

 The fact that God made me. I am a result of His thoughts...His plans. That, to me, is mind blowing. I'm a human and sometimes, I forget who knitted me together, and I get wrapped up in what the world has to say about what's right or wrong with me. Over the years, as I've matured spiritually, I've learned to use the Word as my mirror, and it always gets me back on the right track. ...The God in me is what I love most about me. 

Love is...Action!!! It's what you make the choice to do and not what you feel. It's selfless and sacrificial. It doesn't depend on all things being perfect. It doesn't depend on whether the recipient has earned it or deserves it. Love can be hard. But, love is everything. It's worth the effort. 

Dawn Sanders on Courage...

What is the most courageous thing you have ever done? 

The most courageous thing I have ever done is go on living after my husband Reginald Sanders passed away. By living, I don't just mean physically living because that was the easy part. God woke me up every morning. All I had to do to keep living physically was not kill myself. The really brave part was the decision that I made to not just live, but live abundantly. That was scary because after Reggie died I understood how fragile life is and how I could put my all into creating an extraordinary life just to have the life I built taken in the blink of an eye. Having that happen, watching all you hard work vanish in a moment, makes you wonder "what is the point?" For me, the point is those extraordinary moments, however brief. Those extraordinary moments make it worth it. So, if I am going to still be here, and God waking me up each morning tells me I am, then I am going to make it worth the risk, worth the struggle. To me, it is worse to have my life taken in the blink of an eye, but not lived while I was alive. I want to make my time, however brief, and make it count. I want it to mean something when I am gone. Otherwise, why am I here?

Despite the crippling effect of fears, do you believe they are purposeful? 

Yes, fears are warning signs of perceived danger ahead. Fears engage our flight or fight response. We need to evaluate the fear and see what it is warranted. Should we take flight (run) to escape the danger? Or should we fight to eliminate the danger? For example, if we are hiking and encounter a snake in our path, the best course of action may be to run to escape the danger the snake presents. That is if it is a poisonous snake or we are unsure if it is a poisonous snake. It isn't worth the risk. It is better to take flight and escape the danger. However, if the snake is not poisonous and we know it is not poisonous, we could continue on our path. Another example is experiencing a major car accident. I was injured in a car accident involving a tractor trailer. I shattered my right heel and couldn't walk for months. When I did begin walking again, it was through months of painful physical therapy. Immediately following the accident, I felt fear whenever I rode on the highway, especially if trucks were around. I felt this fear even though I had ridden in cars without having an accident for decades before the accident. I wanted to escape the danger presented by the trucks whenever I saw one. However, I pushed through this fear because I evaluated it to fear that I needed to fight. This shows that sometimes you have to fight fear. Fear itself can be dangerous. That is why you have to evaluate every fear to see if it is valid and what the correct course of action should be based on the result of your evaluation.

How would you encourage people on how to overcome intimidation? 

I would encourage people to overcome intimidation by using what I said above about fear. Intimidation is a form of fear, so your response should be flight (escape the danger) or fight (eliminate the danger). Neither of these responses is give into the danger. I also would encourage anyone feeling intimidated to remember that escaping the danger can mean that you, possibly with the help of others, can figure out a way to remove yourself from the situation and that fighting does not mean that you have to fight alone. One of the strongest tools in an intimidators toolkit is deception. An intimidator wants, even needs if s/he is to be successful, you to believe what she tells you is the truth when often it isn't. Instead, intimidators lie and deceive to convince and persuade you to do what they want because they know the truth will free you from the fear and intimidation with which they are trying to oppress you. When being intimidated, seek the truth. It will set you free of the fear.

Tiffani Denham on Leadership...

Nicole Williams on Beauty...

Can beauty be defined? 

Absolutely.  I believe it can, but it cannot be touched.  You can’t lay a finger on it.  I believe beauty is an intangible light on the inside of all of us.  Beauty is our purest and most foundational self.  It’s the light inside of us that points back to God.  It’s what you see, sense and feel in another person that sparks the light inside yourself.  A light created, fed and fueled by God.

Beauty allows you to rest.  Beauty puts you at ease.  Beauty reminds you of the beauty within yourself.  It is rest in God.  It is rest in His handiwork.

What do I find most beautiful? 

God’s handiwork.  It is the presence of God among us, tangibly seen and beheld.  His sunsets, His rain, His fields of wildflowers.  His human handiwork.  We reflect that beauty most purely when we are at rest in Him; when we are carefree in His care, just as the mountains and the stars are.  That’s when there’s a light in our eyes that cannot be explained, only sensed.  That’s when we walk through the world as we were truly intended to: in divine and sincere fellowship with our God as Adam was in the garden.  This is utterly beautiful.

What do I find beautiful about myself?

My ease at being transparent with myself and with others.  I live in the face and under the watch of God, so I don’t (and haven’t ever) feared others or their opinions of me.  I find it beautiful that I am courageous and unafraid to follow my instincts when taking risks.  This is the freedom and liberty I have in the God who created me.  I think my ability to throw my head back and laugh makes me beautiful.  Freedom and confidence in the finished work of Christ makes me beautiful.  Aesthetically, I see this in the way I present myself to the world:  never doing too much and always comfortable adorned in the things that reflect the joy I have inside.  Each piece of clothing, jewelry or accessory reflects how I feel on the inside.  I live inside out.  And I think that is beautiful.  Telling the truth is beautiful.  Being honest with yourself and others is beautiful.  Eyes that see God’s goodness and craftsmanship inspires beauty within me.  And resting in the fearfully and marvelously made handiwork of God Almighty is the crown of my beauty.